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Well let me start off by saying hello to everyone. My name is Ryan -aka- Red Dawg. I went a majority of my life without really knowing God. I didn't have any type of faith/ religious upbringing. I wasn't popular in school, wasn't a jock or anything like that. I was a band geek I quess you could say. I got a lot of people making fun growing up due to my red hair,and I wasn't athletic, had a couple of front teeth that were crooked. ONly had a couple fo best friends growing up. Only have two of the three best friends now. I was raised with the old school type teaching (never hit a woman, don't talk back to your elders, don't start a fight but be sure to finish it, etc.) I came for a upper lower class family. Dad was self employed for many years and my mom was employed in the healthcare field. Dad is supposedly Roman Catholic, and Mom - I can't remember what she said she was. things were hard on us as a family, never had much $$ and didn't do alot as a family as the years progressed. Never really had a close relationship with my dad. still don't even at the age of 35 that I am now. Mom, though I am still close to. My dad was unfaithful to my mom twice in their 29 1/2 years of marriage. they lost a home together the first time whan I was about a year old, as dad let my mom for another woman, which I do remember the lady who they always said was my mom until my mom told me otherwise when they split for the second and last time. the lady that I described that I remember at the age of 1 with my dad was the lady he left my mom for the first time. Dad did it again 7 years ago with another married woman who divorced her husband to be with my dad who divorced my mom. this took a toll on a family which was already in disorder with the loss of my grand parents individual deaths. The 2nd(and last) split took a really hard toll on my sister who was 16 at the time. things were not good then. luckily God saw me through all of that. As I said I never really knew God, not until after my wife and I got married, She came from Baptist household growing up, but in her later teens was quite rebelious toward her upbringing as she fell away from what she grew up with. I happened to see a local pastor's tv show once and thought he was quite interesting, not being what I perceived as a typical pastor to be. H had a beard and a demin jacket on and sang praise songs and were not in the hymn books with a low scruffy voice. that caught my attention a little. I saw the show again a few times and found out that they were having a Christmas concert ('96), free at one of the loacl schools. We attended and I was speechless. I had to go down and meet this guy after the show. He invited us to his church (Calvary Chapel), and after a little bit we went to a service. Definetely wasn't what I had always figured church to be. We went to another concert that they had (I think it was an Easter service) and I stood up when he called out to all of us that didn't have a personal relationship with Jesus. THye prayed for those of us that stood up that night and I became saved that same night. we started attending the services on a more regular basis which my wife was really longing for as god had been wroking on her since prior to our mariage ceremony. And in June of 2000 I was baptized in the ocean at a local state park by Pastor Ken, my wife was baptized again (the first time at the age of 4 or 5, as she said she really didn't think she fully understood what it menat when she was that age). God was a big part in our lives then., but the dark one was able to get a foothold in between us and God and we started to fal away from Him. we started to return to him after while but it wasn't as strong as it was before. that was when I started talking with some people from a motorcycle ministry then called CMD M/M Christ's Motorcycle Disciples (now known as Messiah's Disciples M/M). After a very long IM conversation with the president I joined the club and was the only one here in Maine until my wife joined shortly there after. we started the state of maine chapter but didn't have the time or knowledge to work on letting it grow. we ended up leaving the club due to the fact that we didn't think that we had to time to really devote to it. But I still remain in contact with some of the members to this day. God had another plan waiting for me. We met the chaplain of the loacl chapter of Sons of God M/C. This was before we left the other ministry. we went to a few of their gatherings and had a great time with them. We became friends. After a little while we felt that a change was neccessary as we had been to Calvary for about 7 years and knew only a hanful of people there. we started too go to the church that pastor steve led. It was a small countryb style church which was nice but even that didn't last long as it was the same faces everyweek and not really any new people, it was nothing against pastor steve or his teachiing (verse by verse study of the bible) but eventually we started to drop in our attendance there. Kinda fell into a slump for a bit and some of the old bad habits came back. We moved to another town and the travel was longer so we slowly stopped going, even tried to go back to Calvary but that too didn't last long. And another low time came in between God and us. Feeling the ned to get back to Him my wife checked out the loacl baptist church inthe town that we live in and found that the times that she went (by herself as I wasn't ready to return to the lighted path yet) the pastor's services always hit home what we were going through. It is a more traditional church and not contemporary when it comes to the music, but man is it ever growing. Pastor Chute is a great pastor, his services are always right on the mark. I started to get back going on occasion, but Satan still found ways to keep me away. I have some digestive issues and flareup from time to time, My doctor says that it's IBS (Irritable Bowel Syndrome). It seemed there for a while and still on occasion that it acts up on sunday mornings and it kept me from attending the services. Satan used it as a wedge between me and growing in the word. But I am not letting it control me anymore. As I know that I need to be there to grow in God's word and to be in fellowship with other christians. Well that is the majority of my life's rolloercoaster. Grace and Peace to you all and God Bless. Keep it upright and rubberside down, and burn rubber, not your soul!
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