I am a kinder, gentler person

By: mellowsong Mood: Happy Date: 05/25/2008 19:37:14 Music: None

For the first time in my life, I can truly say I'm happy and content.  I am through the ups and downs of withdrawal from psychotropic medications and I'm riding high on a new personal relationship with Jesus.  Everyday I am more and more able to give Him my problems and NOT worry.  I am also aware of Jesus and the Holy Spirit at work in my life as I never have been before.  I want to shout it from the mountaintops.  I am filled with joy.

I am noticing things about myself that I like and this is amazing.  I respect all life more than ever.  I've always been very pro life and loved animals, but now I even acknowledge that God made bugs too and let them live.  Mowing my lawn, a spider walked in front of me, a big ugly spider.  I'm terrified of spiders (or was) but I figured he lived out in my lawn, so I let him pass instead of stomping on him or mowing over him.  A wasp landed on my arm while I was picking chard (I have 15 containers of vegetables growing).  I didn't move and I wasn't frightened.  It flew off without stinging me.  I try to leave as much clover as I can unmowed because I'm seeing a lot of honeybees and bumble bees in the blossoms now.  I know this may all sound silly to some of you reading this, but I think it's profound for the changes it shows.

My hot Irish/Italian temper is vanishing.  When something happens, I'm able to stay cool and instead of wishing dastardly things on the person I start praying blessings on them.  This particularly applies to the staff of the mobile home park I live in.  Their sole purpose in life seems to be harrassing me.  It's working....oh, they still harrass me, but it rolls off now.  I no longer hate my home, the park etc.  I am content.  I am happy.  Praise the Lord, I can really say I am happy!